Stop and Think

The convenience and portability of modern technology makes moments of solitary silence a more and more fleeting experience. When I had several minutes in the car with my almost thirteen-year-old daughter, I inquired about the last time she was all alone and, excluding sleep, was happy while not doing anything but dwelling on her own thoughts. She really couldn't come up with a time that she was just doing nothing all by herself, except for when she was going to sleep. And for her, she often prefers to fall asleep to a movie.

So I asked her to consider what she might think about if she took the time to simply be alone.  I find that too often my thoughts turn to the things I think I am missing. I have become so accustomed to constant sensory stimulation that its absence causes me to wonder about all the things I am missing. Sometimes my thoughts focus on memories as I relive both happy and sad moments of my life. These reflections help as long as I use lessons learned to make better choices now rather than simply rue on things I cannot change.

But I suggested to my daughter that one valuable skill is the ability to focus on the elusive present. When I am comfortably at peace with who I am and how I feel, those solitary moments feel nothing like confinement; they allow a soul-centered transcendence where cognitive dissonance flees in the face of conscious clarity. I am completely unable to articulate the experience nor describe a step-by-step formulation that will guarantee a similar outcome. I actually think if I could replicate the experience at will, it would lose much of its luster and value.

Whether I undergo a substantial change, I find great value in learning to be happy while being alone. I love to ride with friends but I cherish the hour or two every day that I spend alone on my bicycle. When I am commuting, I pay very close attention to the traffic around me and so I am not in a setting of complete isolation, but I ride less traveled roads and paths and I have time to think and to ponder. Even though there are people around me, I receive very few messages and I am able to simply think. I cannot overstate the value of this time.

It may be called mediation, reflection, introspection, deep thought or any of dozens of names. Whatever the name, we must all rededicate ourselves to making the time to ponder without the distractions of constant stimulation. Humanity suffers when we discount the value of complete peace whilst being alone and apparently doing nothing. I can only hope that everyone has known the quiet ecstasy of personal peace in a private palace of personal presence. This is a skill that we must preserve.

So stop reading and take some time to come to peace with who you are and may be.